Inner Child Healing
Most of our traits are shaped before the age of 8 years old, when our minds are predominantly in the Theta state, and we soaked up everything around us like a sponge. The subconscious mind is like a movie camera recording every second of everything that happens to you in your entire life.
You have created a persona, of who you have come to believe is who you are, due to circumstances and experiences you have had as a child. This persona is known as the EGO and is not who you truly are, but who you now believe that you are.
The ego is a collection of all the beliefs, patterns and learned behaviors, sitting in the subconscious mind, and is our sense of identity. Our sense of separation with the world, feelings of incompleteness and any image we hold of ourselves.
As a young child, before the age of 8 usually, you learned that you were worthy or lovable by what you did or did not do, depending on how your parents and others in authority treated you. You began to believe that the source of your wholeness and worth came from outside of you. Therefore your sense of self is connected to other people’s behavior, levels of love and approval.
The truth is that your TRUE SELF stands on its own merits and is a whole system all by itself, unconditionally loved and accepted by existence.
You were born, and still are, a whole being. It is through experiences, words, and deeds from others around you, that you have become to believe that you are not whole.
INNER CHILD HEALING
As a young child, you picked up an emotional wound, through a mistake you made. For example, you messed a glass of milk and your mother reprimanded you by saying that you were clumsy. You felt that you had fallen short of your mother’s expectations, and a belief started to form that you were unworthy of your mother’s love. Should you do something similar again, then the belief became stronger and eventually that is what you would believe about yourself, and you would develop an emotional wound. Your feelings of unworthiness were then activated.
Remember that you were still a child, so your reasoning was immature, and you developed childish emotion-based reasoning. Your emotional development in that area would get stuck at that age creating an inner child wound.
As previously mentioned, when you meditate, you are attempting to quiet the inner thoughts, so that you can hear your inner guidance which is wisdom from your higher self. The inner dialogue, which is much louder than the voice of your higher self, comes from the ego, who is trying to survive in whatever situation you find yourself in.
THE EGO PERSONA
The ego’s only purpose in life is self-preservation. All the ego is concerned with is survival, security, comfort and social status, and will do anything to protect the body from perceived danger or perceived harm.
The ego remembers those emotional wounds, and wants to protect you from the danger that you perceived yourself to be in at the time, based on your childish emotion-based reasoning.
If you find yourself in a similar situation as what happened to you as a young child, for example someone who you usually get your feelings of worthiness from degrades you, and then an inner child wound is triggered. The same chemicals in the body are activated from the memory including the feelings of unworthiness, powerlessness, pain etc.
If you are concerned with finances, or about your behavior around other people, and worry whether they will like you or not, then your ego is in control. As well as when you find yourself criticizing or judging others, and being negative and angry.
If the inner child is wounded, you will feel unsafe, dismissed, rejected, abandoned and unworthy. She is terrified to come out and play and instead will try to get your attention by screaming out in pain. When negative emotions bubble up, you throw tantrums or get upset over minor things, then you know that you have an inner child wound that needs to be rescued.
INNER CHILD HEALING
Once your inner child wounds have been healed, you will not be offended by what someone else says about you, as you will know it is not the truth and your sense of identity will not be threatened. Healthy beliefs reflect back to us as we will be living in flow, ease and success.
The inner child is a living energy. If the inner child is feeling safe, cherished, protected, loved, worthy and accepted, she comes out to play. As a result you feel creative, expansive, generous, loving and joyful. And you absolutely know how to receive from the Universe, how to speak up, honor yourself, be authentic and how to generate truth and wholesomeness. You will automatically remove yourself from what and who is not supporting you in this.
In summary, the ego is not the inner child, but the part of ourselves that has formed as a defense mechanism to avoid going inwards to heal our inner child. Ego is an impostor, the pain body (as Eckardt Tolle calls it), and a false self. The ego’s purpose is to keep you from healing your inner child.
To get rid of the ego, you need to go to the wound that the ego is guarding, and heal it, then the ego has no leg to stand on. If you do not pay attention to the inner child and go heal the inner wounds, then the brain is triggered into survival programs that are fueled by the young, helpless and powerless child you were at the time the wound developed.